Dirk and Jenny sitting in front of the computer. Both regularly write in a blog about their life together.
Dirk and Jenny got married after a year. Jenny wears a necklace with a heart. A ring would not fit over her silicone finger.
Dirk powders and massages Jenny’s feet. He cares for her silicone skin every Sunday after bathing to keep it soft.
Dirk and Jenny were wed in their apartment, dressed in their finest attire. Dirk gifted Jenny with a heart-shaped pendant, and the slow melodies of Neil Young’s Such a Woman could be heard in the background. Dirk officiated the ceremony himself. Unlike most blushing brides, Jenny was and is a “real doll,” designed to look closely like a human woman although she is made of silicone. As Germany-based photographer Sandra Hoyn learned throughout her time documenting Dirk’s marriage to Jenny, their bond cuts deeper than that between a man and his sex doll; for Dirk, Jenny is a life partner.
When Hoyn met Dirk via an internet forum in the fall of last year, she was surprised at how quickly he invited her into his private life with Jenny. He was wary of press and photographers—and fearful that his relationship would be pre-judged—but the desire to share his and Jenny’s story won out over any hesitation he might have had. With the agreement that Hoyn would change his name and avoid releasing images in which his face was visible, the photographer set about candidly chronicling the day-to-day rituals of the couple. Dirk, who is approximately forty years of age, works from home beside Jenny. He bathes her on Sundays, and sometimes they watch football.
Before he purchased Jenny, Dirk suffered from a psychological breakdown. The doll, he says, helped him to heal. He talks to her and cares for her, and he believes that she can speak back. Hoyn titles the series Jenny’s Soul after the spirit Dirk says he recognizes when he looks at his wife. Dirk acknowledges that it seems far-fetched that Jenny reciprocates his love for her, and he has his moments of doubt. Ultimately, though, he concludes that Jenny has descended from another planet, an undiscovered realm wherein minds are disconnected from the corporeal body and the five senses available to humankind.
Dirk’s life with Jenny exists only behind closed doors. He dims the lights in his house to obscure the view of neighbors and conceals her in the bedroom when he has guests. His child, born from a previous marriage, and his ex are unaware of Jenny’s existence. Dirk treasures the quiet nature of his life with the doll; since the breakdown, he prefers life to be calm, and both he and Jenny spend a good deal of time resting. At times, admits Hoyn, the noise she made seemed to jar Dirk.
Although the photographer was initially a bit uncertain of what to make of Jenny, she was soon moved and convinced by the earnestness of Dirk’s devotion. When Jenny was set down for a nap, she found herself lowering her voice so as not to unsettle the doll’s sleep. The photographer came to understand Jenny as not only a doll but also as Dirk’s beloved, and at times, she worried about whether or not Jenny would approve of her presence.
Dirk and Jenny have been together for four years, and he fantasizes about being able someday to bring her out in public. He longs to dance with her, but her size makes her unwieldy and difficult to maneuver. Were he to find a human romantic companion, he would ask that she also love and embrace Jenny. He fears for what will happen to Jenny when he grows old. Jenny’s soul, says Dirk, is one that is vulnerable, uncorrupted, and inquisitive. She is fragile and defenseless, and he cherishes his role as her guardian and protector. Hoyn hopes that her images will break through the judgement of Dirk’s unconventional lifestyle; in the end, she suggests, we all need to feel loved.
Dirk holding Jenny’s face in his hands
“With my ex-wives I always had to fight for love. Not with Jenny. With her I found peace.”
Dirk carrying Jenny into the bathroom. He always has to remove the door so that Jenny fits through. “Jenny is such a sensitive being. She is so helpless.”
“It is difficult to clean Jenny from the inside after we have had sex, so I’d rather come outside. In the beginning we had a lot of sex, as it is usual in any relationship when you are newly in love. Now this is no longer so important for us.”
“Jenny comforts me. She is the best therapist for me. She has completely changed my life, my thinking, my definition of freedom, of love and partnership.”
Dirk and Jenny have a fixed daily schedule. Every evening at 6 pm they are sitting on the sofa watching television.
Jenny’s body is not perfect anymore. Her skin peels off.
“Jenny likes to wear beautiful clothes. But she does not care for brands.” Every Sunday Dirk washes her lace lingerie and wigs.
“At the moment, I don`t need any other women. Otherwise she would have to share my love with Jenny.”
“Jenny gives me security. I never want to live without her again. I am moved by her words. The purity, serenity and honesty of her speaking.”
Jenny sitting in a wheelchair in front of the window. She weighs about 50 kg so Dirk uses a wheelchair to walk with her through the apartment.
Dirk resting with Jenny in bed. Both need to rest often; they have a nap every day.
“I can´t live without love. My loneliness destroyed me.”
All images © Sandra Hoyn
via LensCulture